Monday, December 10, 2012


I've purged a significant amount of my belongings to clear the floor and find happiness. Clearing space has actually done something even more interesting. It's made my soul-crushing job stand out more than it did before. Despite efforts to hold off on looking at my career (what about budgeting??), it's all I can think of. The truth is, I don't have major bills to pay, so it wouldn't make sense to show you my spending. This will come when I move back out on my own.

After spending time improving my performance/efficiency, I realized that my boss' bullying and manipulation has taken a priority and I can't tell whether this career is right or wrong, for me.

There has been a lot of work that went down between the previous post and this one.  I’ve been trying to get along with my boss. I thought the job wasn’t for me, because of him, but that’s not the correct way to think of things. 

Before deciding that a job isn't the right fit, I've learned to think about the work I've already done to solidify my position and relationships built with superiors and colleagues. I know much more than when I first started. 

Since this working relationship has become a cloud on my judgment, I will clear it to see whether my job and I are a good match.  Here’s a rundown of some things I attempted before deciding to request reassignment to a new team:
Went with the flow. I did things his way to see if he'd ease off and our relationship would improve, so I can focus on the work at hand.

Voiced my concerns politely and pleasantly. The micromanaging and passive aggressive jabs at my confidence started to take a toll, so I simply pulled him into a conference room and told him the way he speaks to me can be done differently. I tried to help him see it from my perspective and help him understand that I will not let his actions go unnoticed.
Kept it Short. An office bully has been the worst for sapping precious productivity. Even more so when it's my own boss. Whether he hovered around my desk, jabbering about how my emails should've been written, or found opportunities to tell me how terrible I was at certain tasks during casual conversation - I cut him off. While I didn't do anything overtly rude, I cut the opportunities by only engaging in work-related conversations. I kept it short and got back to work. My hope was that he would soon get the hint that I'm uninterested and focused on what's important.

Stayed focused. Being blindsided at work is distracting, worrisome, irritating and looms large like a giant black cloud. I often tried to get a moment to take a deep breath and remember that my focus must remain on the tasks at hand. My bullying boss hoped to derail my energies, waiting on the sidelines for me to screw up. I tried to remember to work to my fullest potential, so my achievements spoke on my behalf.

Killed 'em, with kindness. Whether he ridiculed my suggestion during a team meeting, or played Account Director when his boss wasn't around, it caused major distraction. I sought to put an end to his reign of terror by killing him with kindness. I responded to every jab with pure sweetness. Realizing his words may have been dripping with venom, I made mine sweet as honey. When he failed to get a rise out of me, he occasionally got bored and went back to his business.
Took the matter to the authorities.  The above efforts haven't exactly done the trick, so I spoke to his boss, who didn't think he could be so terrible.  Only after reaching out our Human Rescources department did my concerns become validated. 
My goal is to transfer onto a different team, so I can continue paying off school loans, saving money and studying to understand whether this is actually a soul crushing job or a diamond in the rough.

 Doing all the correct actions methodically, without pushing aggressively or giving up will give me the best outcome when the time is right. Fingers crossed!